Maybe because there is no schedule yet for the registration of new nurses in Manila and the oath-taking that is why the news hasn’t completely sunk in my system. Strange! Haha. I guess my body just wants to experience wearing once again that white uniform. Whatever! I just knew it! I used to have good thoughts on what to write in a blog post if ever I would pass the NLE. And now, all those words are gone like they have never really crossed my mind even at once. Anyhoo, will try my best though. So help me God. 🙂
The day the much-awaited results of the Nursing Licensure Exam came out was the day we least expected it to be published. Everybody was expecting it to be released last weekend and not on a Thursday when everybody’s trying to do something else to at least not feel how slow the days were when you’re waiting for something that is capable of making a huge impact on how the rest of your life would be. I was on a training for TESOL. Yes, this part of myself who wanted to become a teacher has just been realized recently when upon searching for information about my solo trip to Vietnam (Got inspired by my cousin, an epitome of an adventurer, who went on a solo travel to Vietnam all the way from Australia, lost her passport at the course of getting drunk with some Vietnamese people she barely knew and found it the day after and who, months after, found herself stranded and asleep on a bench in an international airport in Japan during the latest earthquake and tsunami hit. I just love her entire experience.), I chanced upon blogs of backpackers coming to Vietnam and sustaining their frugal lifestyle by means of teaching English to the locals. And the rest is another story.
So after the training for that day, I immediately went to church and attended the 6pm mass. (Thank God because I was able to survive an hour of slow traffic everyday from the training center to Lourdes church. I’ve been trying my best to do this religiously since Feb 2. And since then, that so-called “peace” has never left me.) Bought food for dinner and headed home. Upon checking my phone I saw a lot of missed calls and messages. The first message I got to read was my brother’s who asked me to answer his calls and pretended that he urgently needed someone to talk to, so i hurried up to reply. Then opened the next message which read as that 5-digit number followed by my full name.
I was so surprised that I broke down and cried right away but that winning, 30-second moment of tears and goosebumps was immediately killed by another congratulatory call and so on and so forth. Since then, that similar moment has not been encountered again. Haha. But that is perfectly fine, of course.
This whole NLE experience is a revelation of how powerful God is. Of how He can turn around everything in a snap. I’m really blessed to be surrounded by prayerful people. It’s not always about how many people you have in your life but how many people are including you in their prayers – their most alone moment with God – and sincerely wishing you well and genuinely happy for you for a victory like this. Since the release of the results, I have been crossing out a lot of answered prayers and I know I’ll be crossing out a lot more for the rest of this year. I’ve waited long for everything to take its place. The waiting wasn’t easy. It took me my entire life. Only God and I know what I had to deal with just to hold on and witness this moment. In just a snap, in just the release of these two letters, every question was answered, every not-so-good memory was erased. It’s very clear to me now that God didn’t want me to become a lawyer. He wanted me to lead another path. Finally, it sunk in that what He wanted for me to become all through these years was a nurse. And a teacher. (Yes, I just got certified last Sunday.) He didn’t only put an end to my waiting, He gave me MORE, BEYOND what I had visualised. Those years were golden. The wisdom I’ve learned was priceless that I wouldn’t trade it had I been given the chance to relive my life.
A friend told me once that the moment she saw her name on the list of new registered nurses, every hurt and pain in her heart and memory vanished like a smoke after it has been dispersed in the air. Now, as I write this, I’m on a blank slate once again. Like that moment when everything seems fresh and new and you have to make a choice. As a wiser and stronger individual, you know that the one you’re choosing this time is the one that is going to make you happy bearing in mind that as long as what you do is pleasing to God, that is all that matters.
P.S. I dedicate these two letters to God, my dad, my mom, my brother, tatay, inang, lolo, lola, SJ, my Merge family and all the people who have prayed and lit candles for me; continued to believe in me and send me their love and care. May God bless these people in ways beyond imagination.
Again, Lord, Jesus, Mama Mary, St. Jude and St. Michael, THANK YOU! 🙂